at the end

help me to feel
to know each step counts
that a beat
that this beat
 matters
that the ray chasing my life in the cloudy sky
 is love
that it is you
that at the end
at the edge
that falling meant
you were there
will be there
that love
life
matters
that in my arms you will fall
and that in your eyes
I will always
see

 me
loving you

To Lance

To Lance Armstrong,

I didn't know where to send this, or even if it will get to you.
But its important to me that i write it...

I don’t know Cancer…
I don’t know that battle and what comes physically aft… 
god willing I will never know…
I've seen the broken hearts after
I've seen the grief
I've held the suffering and prayed for their families

do I believe you cheated, do I believe that you swallowed the magic pill to make you a champ?

I believe, that you made me believe,
that you danced on your peddles and asked and persuaded an entire community,
 be them riddled with cancer or touched by such, to not give up to try, to be strong, to do 
what it takes…. 

I am inspired by a flat lander, accused as a cheat in the sport I love. 

I will tell you this, that in the grander scheme of things… 
I would stand next to you 
will stand next to you

as you Sir 
have done a greater good than any bad

you have raised people above their illness, above a sickness, above doubt. 

and I hope in the darkest parts of your night you know that we all have to dance through the insanity, 
but for some, you have given a path and in that path… you have given light. 

and for that i hope you find your path...

I hope the band of yellow survivors you have challenged and gave hope to, relive and tell that story... because of you they have found their strength. 

God Bless and Livestrong

you let me in

a nights drive so far in dusk's last dance
dancing around your curious voice

you let me in

a slight touch lets me in and I know…. we know

you let me in

we laugh, listen and love…
your eyes dance in hidden tears and you push and pull

the same moon shines on our days and we love the same
with passion, conviction and desire

your touch plays life on my hearts strings and I wish for an encore…

you loved without even knowing…  

smiles

... smiles i think are the things i want, wanted the most from you, for you.  to see the clouds as your stage and the sun your spot... to live in the light love created.

your laugh would be our life's sound and with the loves beat, we would dance to the music in your heart.... our heart, and the sun would hover above my love, my loves beauty
 as she knew to not extinguish the light of loves delight
and in our slumber the moon would crave a place to live

sweet moon dance in the suns slumber and know
with every dream
my love
my sweet
lays with you …
and in the my loves slumber
loves heart is mended
and love again will smile

my love will again smile
smile with love

sometimes

Sometimes
in the sun
you bask in life’s loving ray

you wait for the breeze to take you
to take you away

Sometimes
you wish to be taken
taken away

to not breathe another day
to wish
to put this lifeless
life away

sometimes
sometimes you want this lifeless life
to blow away

sometimes
you want to not look
to not see

Sometimes
sometimes you want
this life
 that has been taken
taken away

to please
please take this
lifeless life
this meaningless
breath

please take it
take it
away

that was me

Hands clasped
a stifling gasp
why don’t you sing to me 

these any mores last forever

lips in sync
we loved love

oh wait
That was me

to be good again

I’m without words, perhaps really just the right words.
Suddenly I feel like a bystander. Lazy in my will, I have the greatest intentions, I have compassion, love desire… but do I have fortitude, strength and courage?

I’m saddened by this day, these days… so disconnected yet we are a post away from a kind word a prayer or a friendly smile. We pass one another without glance. Not realizing the chance of each other’s worth as another compassionate soul or a wonder bound being lost in the same cosmos…
we are all of the same father… yet we act as if we thieve the very air we breathe.

I’m tired of defending the idea that people are good. We have been raised in a “me first” generation.
In the big scheme of things… we are all the little guy.

I want my babies to see the good in people. To have compassion even when their day, their will is being stressed. They have the smiles of angels and they can light the world with but a grin and I am so proud of them all. They are truly my breath.

Where am going with all this?

My Grandmother Mary once said to me “Be good to all people, you never know who might be an angel”

I want to us to remember how to be good again…. 

we keep them inside

Give me a reason,

 Please
emptiness prevails and love waits in places we don’t travel

How will I taste the sweet that you hold, that you hide,
I’ve danced in your shadow, I’ve waited for you to call me inside
I wait for you to call me sweet and let me play in our night
I want to run to live in the world we might  make tonight

this emptiness dances in circles
circles, circles
circles are easy …
we keep them inside…..

You are my reason
my night, my day and the falling star that wishes bounce from
I run in circles
I run in circles from your words
I run from your arms

And I run to your touch
to your lips
my circles, our circles are my life

this emptiness dances on my soul and I wait for you to come inside
I wait for your heart to let me
to let me
inside 

behind crooked smiles

when all you think you have is the cold taste of a barrel against your teeth, I hope you remember the mirror…remember that I’m watching you and I love you. I’m sorry you’re lonely and empty. I’m sorry. Things should have been different. I’m sorry that the empty part of your heart is made of the lost dreams that made it so big. I wish you didn’t have to crawl through glass to feel, to know love.
I wonder if you weren’t here you would know the empty places that you fill. Why do you swallow so much? Why don’t you cry? It’s cold outside and I can’t bare another round of cheer. I hope we find a place to put your heart. When I first met you, wait, I’m not sure I know you. You hide behind crooked smiles and waxed brows. Why won’t you let me in? It’s another night that you’ll try to forget, the dizzy mornings come so quick. Stumbling through the morn you’ll make your way, but your heart my heart…is losing. I hope I’ll miss you when you’re gone, and I hope again and again I’ll wake. But hope soon loses to time. 

she smiled at you

it’s seems just out of reach
the touch,
the kiss

she’s coming as you’re going 

your innocent glance 
a lost chance
a brush of skin
her scent 

as her smile disappears on the way
green, blue, brown…
no matter,
she smiled at you